Directory Enquiries reviews

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On the weekend, I needed to find the programme line 'phone number for my local cinema and as I had 10 minutes to kill, I thought this would be an ideal time to review the new 192 discounted alternative numbers which have been advertised lately. Why? Because I could. I've attempted to transcribe what I can remember of the conversation I had with each of the three directory enquiry services...

Call 1 - number: 118118 (20p a minute, offers extra services):

[about 12 rings to pick up]

operator: hello, 118118, how can I help?

me: I'd like the number for the Clapham Picture House in Clapham please.

operator: [pauses for about 30 seconds] in Bedfordshire?

me: no, Clapham in London

operator: [10 second pause] I can't find it. Clapham spelled C-L-A-P-P-A-M?

me: no, C-L-A-P-H-A-M

operator: [30 second pause] oh. Here are the films..[reels off list of films showing at the cinema far too quickly to be of any use]

me: umm - can I have the number?

operator: I'll put you through...[puts me through to the booking line, instead of the programme line]

Call 2 - number: 118888 (20p a minute):

[about 5 rings to pick up]

operator: hello, 118888, how can I help?

me: I'd like the number for the Clapham Picture House in Clapham please.

operator: [pauses for about 30 seconds] okay, I'll put you through [puts me through to the booking line, instead of the programme line]

Call 3 - number: 192 (40p a minute: soon to be replaced by 118500):

[1 ring to pick up]

operator: hello sir, which number do you require?

me: I'd like the number for the Clapham Picture House in Clapham please.

operator: [no noticeable pause] would you like the box office or programme line sir?

me: programme line please

operator: thankyou [connects to voice reading out number, followed by option to connect directly]

So, overall, I found 192 by far the best and worth paying a little extra for. My conclusion? Better the devil you know. Ah, Kylie, such wise words...